Here's another book I wish I'd read years ago. If you feel like you're nagging all day—brush your teeth, put on your shoes, pick up your backpack—it gives you another way to experiment with communicating. Instead of constantly issuing instructions or asking questions, you can share an observation: “Hmm, your backpack looks like it's ready to trip someone.” Then wait. That space is part of the work. It gives your child a chance to notice, think, and respond. I learned about this book through the PDA world, but thoughtful communication helps everyone. I keep it around to remind myself that I have other ways to talk to my teens—and even my spouse. It's short, and it nudges you toward a slower way of talking that can create more connection.